Monday, March 31, 2014

Our most valuable assets

Hi readers,

I'm writing with a heavy heart today, but after much pondering, I think what I have to say must be spoken, or written, anyways.

This past weekend, I was taking one of my favorite three-year-olds to the local park for a few hours. It was a beautiful afternoon, and I couldn't fathom staying indoors all day. As I was standing at the base of the play equipment looking up at him, I felt someone grab at my mid-section. I glanced down and behind me to find a small boy who I'd guess to be 4 or 5 years old with his arms wrapped around my legs.

Surprised, I started quizzing the blue-eyed beauty who was dressed in pajamas and smelled worse than my dog after she rolls in the mud. His answers were more heart-wrenching with each question I asked. The truth I gleaned from our short exchange made me sick to my stomach.

He wanted nothing from me but attention, and it brightened his face to know someone was watching him climb up the biggest slide in the park. Eventually, he asked me to hold him. Without any thought, I picked up the child, grabbed the one entrusted to my care by the hand, and we started towards grandma, who was not in the least interested in our exchange. She saw us walking towards her and yelled, "Put him down! He's only a womanizing bastard like his father," and simply went back to her earth-shattering phone conversation.

"A womanizing bastard like his father? Really? He's only a child!!!" I thought to myself. Any words I had to say weren't even remotely appropriate for the little ears that surrounded me, so I said nothing in that moment. Instead, I turned back around with her grandson in my arms, held him tightly, and said, "Honey, you're not a bastard and you don't have to be like your daddy at all. You are precious, do you understand?" He was quiet. I wanted nothing more than to take him home, give him a bath, put him in clean clothes, feed him actual food, and let love wash over his little heart until he actually felt wanted. Unfortunately for him, the law wasn't in either of our favor.

The afternoon carried on, and finally, grandma whisked him away up the hill and out of sight. Nothing I had to say changed her mind, and to her, that child was nothing more than nuisance. That boy was crying out for help that day, and yet he still left as a neglected, and most probably, abused child. The law, the system, the state, his sperm and egg donors, his blood family, and myself all failed the kid. That's a hard pill to swallow.

Where do we go from here? To a world where child abuse and neglect didn't exist, I wish. Instead, let me leave you with some food for thought.

First of all, anyone that might hurt a child will answer for their actions. If not in this life, most certainly in the next. I know the heart of God breaks when children are treated like trash, and I know there is great healing that can be had by any broken person, including the discarded, unwanted, abused, and unloved.

Secondly, treasure the babies around you, whether they're 3 days, 3 years, or 30 years old. God hasn't blessed with me children yet. If He'd give me the go-ahead, I'd have half a dozen stair-steppers, but I'm still waiting. All things fair and that being said, love the ones around you. Kids, grand kids, god-children, nieces, nephews, neighbor kids, school kids, the secretary's kids, whoever. I'm not saying raise them (unless their yours, of course), but love them. Value them. Respect them. Stick up for them. Give them the time of day. Fat, thin, stupid, smart, impaired, fully-functioning, whatever, they are worth it. Red and yellow, black and white, they are precious in His sight...

Finally, do something to change the status quo. How can you, an ordinary, overbooked citizen make a change?

1. Start with your own family first. If you've made mistakes with your children, make it right. Say "I'm sorry." Be the agent of change in your own home. Quit bullying, stop talking trash, and don't take a single moment for granted. Your kids (no matter their age) don't need perfect parents, but they do deserve your best efforts.

2. Vote for politicians that favor children's rights and common sense laws. Have no misunderstanding and make no mistake, I'm not talking about stripping parents of their right to parent, discipline, educate, make medical decisions, or the like. I'm talking about providing basic human rights of safety and care to those children who aren't old enough or able enough to speak up or fight for themselves. Let's do away with all of the red tape, the thousand foster home placements, the million second chances given to free-will adults who have no desire to change. Anyone can create a baby, but not everyone should raise one.

3. Volunteer. There are countless organizations in Jasper County alone that need your help supporting our youth. Maybe you have a half hour once a week to have lunch with a grade-school child. Call the admin building; they have a spot for you! Maybe you have three afternoons a week to be a TREK coach; call the district and you can start tomorrow. Maybe you have no time at all, but you could easily swing donating a package of diapers to the Children's Haven or a box of cookies to Bright Futures so a child can celebrate their birthday with their classmates. Nobody can do it all, but everybody can do something.

4. Actively fight against injustice. Stand up to the b**ches at the park that think it's okay to call their young grandsons "womanizing bastards." Don't sit in silence when you see a child being neglected or abused. Report said instances, even if your voice isn't heard or well accepted the first time, the second time, or even the tenth time. Eventually, ignoring you, and more important ignoring them, won't be an option.

The end.

Safety and security don't just happen, they are the result of collective consensus and public investment. We owe our children, the most vulnerable citizens in our society, a life free of violence and fear. - Nelson Mandela

A person's a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Seuss

A hundred years from now it will not matter what my bank account was, the sort of house I lived in, or the kind of car I drove...but the world may be different because I was important in the life of a child. - Forest Witcraft

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